One of those knick knacks about being human is that whenever we create something, we tend to pass on a little of ourselves to our creation. It doesn’t matter if it’s a work of art or even a programming language. They all have flavor and character.
This post first appeared on CodingNinja, where they gave a form to programming languages. They represented each language with a superhero.
Assembly as Hulk
It’s all raw power down here. Just brawn no brain. Assembly is the closest you can get to manipulating hardware directly, making it super powerful like Hulk. But it comes with a downside – you have to everything yourself. <em>There are no safety nets, the world is not made of rainbows and kittens. Assembly is a lone gun and will carry that heavy burden all day long. </em>
Now don’t go making Assembly angry, it may just crash on you.
Python as Batman
Coder: I never cared who you were..
Python: And you were right.
Coder: …but shouldn’t the people know the hero who saved them?
Python: A hero can be anyone. Even a language doing something as simple and reassuring as importing a library around a young code’s shoulders to let him know that the world hadn’t ended.
[Starts compiling]
Coder: Python?
PHP as The Joker
Some languages are just twisted, so mangled that they were never meant to be understood. Because some languages aren’t looking for anything logical, like compile time. They can’t be documented, consistent, reduced, or negotiated with. Some languages just want to watch the world burn.
C++ as Robocop
C was an average, hardworking, reliable language. But it couldn’t help itself around OOP! So you have this demonic, unlawful, loud child running around in a shiny costume with too many powerful toys. But if you can master things like <em>protected abstract virtual base</em>, then you’re good to go!
Ruby as Ironman
Ruby is advanced, its neurokinetic nanoparticle morphological language is were its power lies. Ruby was created out of necessity, to escape out of a world of binary waste. Some say it was created by a single man by the name of Matz in a cave. But lately people say, it’s become just a big “front” for more powerful frameworks. Which is sad because the new generation of kids conflate Ruby with the framework “Ruby On Rails”.
Java as Magneto
Java is an old language, born from the ashes of C and C++. It’s very verbose, but heavily engineered. <em>If you want to lift heavy metal, steel or a suspension bridge Java will not let you down. Of course the downside is if you want to lift small light plastic things, Java will be of no use. Java believes that native languages like C and C++ are a disease and that managed languages are the next evolution. Java believes in a final war between native and managed languages as an inevitable clash.</em>
Lisp as Professor Xavier
Is code data or is data code? some say “it’s all in your RAM”. And as for language, do you really need syntax? When you look deep enough you will find that all languages are connected and can be expressed by an AST. Lisp’s simplicity and metacircular evaluator is nothing short of pure genius that is perhaps only comprehensible on another metaphysical plane of existence.